Is It Because I’m a Gemini? The Duality of a Solo Traveler

Fast. Slow.

City. Nature.

Black. White.

Solo. Together.

Serious. Playful.

Loud. Quiet.

These aren't just words showcasing duality; they are a part of me. I have been a Gemini for the past 35 years. I am a single child, but when you are a Gemini, you have a built-in twin.

Just how much duality plays a large part in my life didn't hit me until a month before my birthday. In the months leading up to it, the word duality kept appearing in different writing prompts I was doing in different writing groups I belonged to. It even came up when taking a moment to analyze my travels of the past few years and my overall life. At times, being a Gemini is a real curse. You go from one extreme to another. You can ask my friends how things pique my interest; they’ll tell you I go hardcore on a particular interest for months, but then it ends as quickly as it started. That's because I get bored quickly.

I went from:

• Running 5ks, 10-milers, half marathons, and even a full marathon to running 0 miles

• Taking four aerial classes a day (thanks to the pandemic) to 1-2 sessions twice a week

• Hiking 3-4 times a week to 3-4 times a month

As a Gemini, you’re always chasing an adventure, an experience, or more. Because of the constant chasing involved in wanting, doing, and being more, being with me can be exhausting— I can personally attest to that statement. At times I have wished, begged, and pleaded for a more “calm” life—no more extremes. But even when life is “calm,” I still seek out some form of extremity…..

There’s One Big, All-Encompassing Goal. But Then . . .

Since high school, I wanted to move to DC, be a productive member of society, and make a change. But that wasn't all; I thought DC was my end game. It was a fast-paced city that I felt I belonged in. It was the cream that settled my itch of wanting more. I joke all the time about how this city has this duality—its own bubble. With work and your personal life, you end up with separate lives in DC. For my DC people, you know what this means. I fell in love with the city because it spoke a language I understood.

Remember when I said being a Gemini is a curse? Ten years later, that cream is long dried up, and I have a new itch.

Colorado.

I’m sure that after a while, I will have a new itch . . . which makes me terrified to move there since I’m over DC, a place I never thought I’d leave.

Duality: Jet-Setting to Foreign Cities Vs. Camping in Bear Country

Traveling has its own duality, its own twin. You may know how the extremes of a twin can be.

The hurry up and wait.

Domestic and international.

Ocean and mountains.

Coffee and wine.

Winter and summer.

The love and hate of traveling.

When I traveled for the first time, all I wanted to do was jet off to different countries and experience them as a local. But then, the pandemic happened, and my other side came out after being exposed to nature and camping.

But that is the beauty of traveling! So many options!

Most people typically like one type of traveling, but I like all kinds. And this is where the internal debate started again when the world reopened.

I could do some people-watching while drinking champagne in a European café or drink cheap beer around a campfire admiring the stars. No limits!

I also have a challenging relationship with no limits. I hate being caged and feeling micromanaged. I crave the freedom of traveling, but when you like too many types of traveling and have no limits, you can feel caged because you just want to do everything.

That’s the thing: being a duality (and a Gemini) traveler trying to figure out which duality will win.

This is why I travel solo; it's not fun to be in my head or around me sometimes.

I did warn you.

It’s My Birthday in London, but not in America!

I’m obsessed with the time difference when I am traveling. Not sure why, but it is really interesting to me, especially if there is a big-time difference. I was lying in bed at my friend's flat, working on things for Wandering Bel, and at 12:45 am (London time), I looked up at my computer's clock. It was my birthday! In America, where I was born, it was only 7:45 pm DC time, but I wasn't even born on the east coast! I am originally from Arizona, so if we went by that time, it was only 4:45 pm! Imagine celebrating a birthday before you were even born! It made me analyze more about my daily life and as a traveler: how we tend to live different lives in general and how we tend to live differently when we travel. Duality really set in right there.   

I woke up around 8 am after being up past my bedtime and I celebrated my birthday by flying to Prague. There is something to be said getting birthday messages from America as you are landing in Prague. There is also something to be said waking up in a different country and sleeping in a different country on your birthday. At least Prague gave me a special gift of an amazing sunset.

Always a duality in my life. Once you see it, you can’t stop seeing it.

The person I am while traveling is not the same person in my everyday life. I am more carefree, at ease, daring, and trusting when I am solo. My everyday life is not as daring (unless you count driving on 270 or 495) and not as at ease. I love that crazy girl who will get a tattoo with a random stranger or pub-hop around Budapest. At times, I really wish she would show up in my daily life because I think she would make it easier for me. But as people have said to me, holiday life isn’t something we should strive for every day, and I understand their point of view. But I still respectfully dissent!

Duality.

She is fun….

Traveling is like that, too; you could have a pint for lunch, but it's breakfast in America. You see the future before your friends do, but try to pretend you are still in the same time zone as them.

In my post called What the Split Life of a Solo Traveler in a London Pub Is Like, I mentioned that when you are out with friends or by yourself, you typically don't think about what is happening in another state, let alone another country. This is because we are so caught up in what we are doing.

But if you have a duality like I do, you always wonder what life is like back in DC while you travel—and vice versa. I tend to overthink things and be more sentimental than most people, but it is interesting to think about duality and how it shapes us and our lives.

Gemini or not, as a solo traveler—or future solo traveler—you’ve most likely felt this same duality on some level on your own adventures.

How has it shaped your life? I want to know when you first noticed the duality of traveling.